English Original
after you're gone
these traces of your scent
on my pillow
while outside the wind
howls a little louder
Fire Pearls, 2006
Thelma Mariano
Chinese Translation (Traditional)
Chinese Translation (Simplified)
自從你走後
你的氣味仍殘留
在我的枕頭上
此時外面的風
大聲呼嘯
Chinese Translation (Simplified)
自从你走后
你的气味仍残留
在我的枕头上
此时外面的风
大声呼啸
Bio Sketch
Thelma Mariano is the author of Night Sky: a Selection of Tanka Poetry. She lives in Montreal and has published her tanka in literary journals as well as in various anthologies including Fire Pearls and Take Five: Best Contemporary Tanka.
The olfactory image of Ls 1-3 conveys a palpable sense of grief for the lose of a loved one while the auditory image of the lower verse enhances the tone and mood of this grief tanka, and the modifying phrase, "a little," adds emotional weight and psychological depth to the tanka.
ReplyDeleteAnd it might be interesting to do a comparative reading of the following tanka:
the jasmine
spreads over the garden
with abandon
my hair unfurls unrestrained
on your pillow without you
The Bamboo Hut, Autumn 2016
Martha Magenta
at the window
I watch a swan take flight
from the lake ...
a hollow in the pillow
on your side of our bed
Eucalypt, 21, 2016
Gavin Austin