Monday, September 15, 2014

One Man's Maple Moon: Chick-a-dee-dee-dee-dee Tanka by Neal Whitman

English Original

at four p.m.
my spirit drops down
like the sun
but then an old friend calls
chick-a-dee-dee-dee-dee

red lights, January 2014

Neal Whitman


Chinese Translation (Traditional)

下午四點
我的精神不濟
像下山的太陽
但是隨後一位老友來電
好像山雀快樂地歌唱

Chinese Translation (Simplified)

下午四点
我的精神不济
像下山的太阳
但是随後一位老友来电
好像山雀快乐地歌唱


Bio Sketch

Neal Whitman began to write general poetry in 2005, haiku in 2008, and tanka in 2011. He writes to be read and believes that the reader is never wrong. With his wife, Elaine, he combines his poetry with her Native American flute and photography in free public recitals with the aim of their hearts speaking to other hearts.

1 comment:

  1. Neal cleverly uses the placement of "-"s to mimic the sounds of a chickadee and create an onomatopoeic effect. The thematic and tonal shift makes this poem work emotionally effectively.

    ReplyDelete