Saturday, January 10, 2015

One Man's Maple Moon: Rocky Outcrop Tanka by Susan Constable

English Original

mist settles
over the rocky outcrop
your voice
softening the edges
of what you have to say

Magnapoets, 7, 2011

Susan Constable


Chinese Translation (Traditional)

晨霧覆蓋
在岩石露頭
你的聲音
柔化了你言詞
的尖銳程度
  
Chinese Translation (Simplified)

晨雾覆盖
在岩石露头
你的声音
柔化了你言词
的尖锐程度


Bio Sketch

Susan Constable’s tanka appear in numerous journals and anthologies, including Take Five. Her tanka collection, The Eternity of Waves, was one of the winning entries in the eChapbook Awards for 2012. She is currently the tanka editor for the international on-line journal, A Hundred Gourds.

2 comments:

  1. This visually and emotionally evocative tanka varies slightly from the classic five- ku (prosodic unites or poetic phrases used by the ELT community) structure, and it is divided into two parts (“jo,” the preface, Ls 1&2 and the main statement, Ls 3-5): the prefatory image is logically metaphoric or at least resonates closely with the emotional point of the tanka ("softening the edges/of what you have to say").

    And Susan's use of the 2nd person POV is effective because of thematic and emotional relatedness.

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  2. The type of jo employed in Susan's tanka is called “ushin” (meaningful). For more info., about the classic structure of waka and the types of jo, see my in-depth analysis of Susan's "Bruise Tanka:" Poetic Musings: Bruise Tanka by Susan Constable, http://neverendingstoryhaikutanka.blogspot.ca/2014/05/poetic-musings-bruise-tanka-by-susan.html

    Scholarly references and tanka examples are included.

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