English Original
all these shiny roofs
and just enough moonlight
to tuck in every tile
First Prize, Rangitawa Publishing Haiku and Humor Contest, 2013
Djurdja Vukelic-Rozic
Chinese Translation (Traditional)
所有這些閃亮的屋頂
和剛好夠用的月光
涵蓋每一塊磁磚
Chinese Translation (Simplified)
所有这些闪亮的屋顶
和刚好够用的月光
涵盖每一块磁砖
Bio Sketch
Djurdja Vukelic-Rozic was born in 1956, lives in the town of Ivanic Grad, Croatia, edits the magazine IRIS, translates and writes poetry, humorous sketches, short stories, haiku and haibun. So far she has published twenty books and translated a number of collections and anthologies into English. And her poetry has received thirty awards.
L1 sets the scene and mood while the fresh and visually effective use of moonlight in Ls 2&3 not only emotionally enhances L1, "all these" "shiny roofs," but also gives a tone of Karumi ("lightness") to this moonlit roofs haiku.
ReplyDeleteStylistically and emotionally speaking, it might be interesting to do a comparative reading of the following "matter-of-fact/objective" roofs haiku:
the view from the roof: more roofs
bottle rockets, Feb. 2015
Pat Tompkins
FYI: For more about Karumi ("lightness"), see 'Poetic Musings: Basho’s First Hokku in the Karumi Style," accessed at https://neverendingstoryhaikutanka.blogspot.com/2013/04/poetic-musings-bashos-karumi-hokku.html