English Original
whispers
between the banks
of this river ...
a buntis woman's
water breaking
Jack Fruit Moon, 2009
Robert D. Wilson
Chinese Translation (Traditional)
這條河
的兩岸之間
潺潺水聲在低語 ...
一名孕婦
的羊水破了
Chinese Translation (Simplified)
这条河
的两岸之间
潺潺水声在低语 ...
一名孕妇
的羊水破了
Bio Sketch
Robert D. Wilson is Co-Owner of Simply Haiku.
The implied contrasting sounds between, whispers/relaxing, flowing water sound of Ls 1-3 and the screams of Ls 4&5, are fresh and poignantly effective.
ReplyDeleteWhat's left unsaid, such as why this pregnant woman is by the river and what comes next after her water breaking, is at least as potent as what's stated.
And it might be interesting to do a thematic comparison reading of the following tanka:
I listen
to autumn speak
through waves ...
thinking of young girls
birthing in shanties
Jack Fruit Moon, 2009
Robert D. Wilson